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How to Get What You Want Every Time: 3 Steps to Negotiate Anything With Anyone

Notable books mentioned: Finding Confidence in Conflict by Kwame Christian, Let Them Theory by Mel Robbins

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Finding Confidence in Conflict cover
Mentioned at 6:21
Finding Confidence in Conflict
Kwame Christian

The host emphasizes the importance of having difficult conversations and how they can lead to respect rather than mere likability. She mentions Kwa…

Kwame's book cover
Mentioned at 21:46
Kwame's book

The host briefly mentions Kwame's book to highlight a specific definition of negotiation. This definition emphasizes that negotiation occurs in any…

Let Them Theory cover
Mentioned at 49:08
Let Them Theory
Mel Robbins

The host discusses the importance of addressing difficult conversations to avoid misunderstandings and resentment in relationships. They reference…

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How to Get What You Want Every Time: 3 Steps to Negotiate Anything With Anyone
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What books were mentioned in this episode?

In How to Get What You Want Every Time: 3 Steps to Negotiate Anything With Anyone, Kwame Christian and the hosts mention Finding Confidence in Conflict by Kwame Christian and Let Them Theory by Mel Robbins with timestamps, quotes, and episode context.

Episode summary
Right now, there’s something you want. Maybe you need help at home, more support from your partner, or it’s time to set a boundary at work. But you’re avoiding the conversation. Why? Because it feels hard. You don’t want conflict, you don’t want to upset anyone, and you just don’t know how to bring it up. That ends today. The greatest things in life are on the other side of hard conversations. And in this episode, you will learn the 3 simple steps to have any difficult conversation and get exactly what you want. Mel sits down with world renowned negotiation expert Kwame Christian, CEO of the American Negotiation Institute, to break down exactly how to approach the conversations you’ve been avoiding. Whether you want to negotiate a raise, ask your partner to step up, or finally tell your friend what’s bothering you, this episode is your crash course in how to advocate for yourself. Inside this episode, you’ll learn: -Why avoiding hard conversations is damaging your relationships (and your self-respect) -How to handle someone’s emotional reaction without losing your cool -The 3-step “Compassionate Curiosity” framework to navigate ANY conflict -Why it’s more important to be respected than liked (and how to make that shift) -How to negotiate at home, at work, and even with your landlord -How to stand up for yourself without starting a fight If you’ve been staying silent, stewing in resentment, or dreading confrontation, this episode will give you the confidence and skills to speak up and change your life. You deserve respect. This is your roadmap to get it. For more resources, click here for the podcast episode page. If you liked this episode, you’ll love listening to this one next: The Most Important Career Advice You’ll Ever Hear With Harvard Business School’s #1 Professor Connect with Mel: Get Mel’s #1 bestselling book, The Let Them Theory Watch the episodes on YouTube Follow Mel on Instagram The Mel Robbins Podcast Instagram Mel's TikTok Sign up for Mel’s personal letter Subscribe to SiriusXM Podcasts+ to listen to new episodes ad-free Disclaimer
Book mentions3
Media mentions0
Topic and sentiment signals

Aggregated from transcript-derived mention metadata for better topical navigation and citation.

Mention sentiment
Deep Dive(1)Highly Recommended(1)Passing Reference(1)
Audience signals
Individuals seeking to improve their communication skillsIndividuals interested in negotiation techniquesIndividuals seeking to improve communication in relationships

Books Mentioned

Finding Confidence in Conflict cover
Best for Individuals seeking to improve their communication skillsOften cited around difficult conversations

Kwame Christian has written this awesome book, Finding Confidence in Conflict, which is also about how you use the science of negotiation in your life to get what you want.

View mention details
Sentiment: Highly Recommended
For: Individuals seeking to improve their communication skills
Key quote: Kwame Christian is recognized as one of the world's top negotiation experts.
The host emphasizes the importance of having difficult conversations and how they can lead to respect rather than mere likability. She mentions Kwame Christian's book as a resource for learning effective strategies to navigate these conversations successfully.
ASIN: 0578413736
Buy on Amazon
Kwame's book cover
Best for Individuals interested in negotiation techniquesOften cited around definition of negotiation

The speaker references a book by Kwame, mentioning a definition of negotiation found on page 11, which describes it as any conversation where someone wants something.

View mention details
Sentiment: Passing Reference
For: Individuals interested in negotiation techniques
Key quote: any conversation where someone wants something.
The host briefly mentions Kwame's book to highlight a specific definition of negotiation. This definition emphasizes that negotiation occurs in any conversation where someone desires something.
Let Them Theory cover
Let Them Theory
Mel Robbins
Best for Individuals seeking to improve communication in relationshipsOften cited around difficult conversations

The speaker mentions writing about a personal story in the Let Them Theory book, reflecting on a misunderstanding with their mother regarding their marriage.

View mention details
Sentiment: Deep Dive
For: Individuals seeking to improve communication in relationships
Key quote: I have to say that as we're sitting here thinking, I take full responsibility for this because I'm the one that avoided the conversation.
The host discusses the importance of addressing difficult conversations to avoid misunderstandings and resentment in relationships. They reference 'Let Them Theory' to illustrate their personal experience of miscommunication with their mother regarding their marriage.
ASIN: B0DFMZMKFJ
Buy on Amazon

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